Ramblings ...

Ah, so much to write about and yet don't know where to start from . Been a long time since my last post . Looking back, it's been a pretty rough going for me but Alhamdulillah things are starting to get better and make some sense . Okey now this post is definitely not gonna be about "poor li'l moi" and "boo hoo-ing" for meself .

Let's start off with what is top most on many peoples minds these days, the earthquake here . Some of you may groan since it seems that's all people can talk about these days but trust me it's even more horrible then the pictures you see on tv or in newspapers . I am living in Rawalpindi these days and used to pass by Margalla Towers almost every day . I and hubbie often used to talk about how nice it would be to have a place of our own there even to the extent that we got the brochures and brought them home to be considered by my father-in-law . The first hint of the disaster created by the earthquake to reach us was the collapse of these very towers . I still can't forget the disbelief with which we all saw the first pictures of it coming on tv . That was the least scary part . Do you know the policemen and some say even the army jawans wouldn't let the ordinary public help at first because they were busy looking through the rubble for money and other valuables ? Same stories are coming from Balakot and Muzzaffarabad of people literally stealing from the dead .

Then there is the latest fad of "helping in the relief operaions" . Young boys and in some cases girls are setting up relief camps in places like Super and Jinnah Super in Islamabad (for those of you who don't know these are the 2 most "happening" places in the Capital). Now nothing wrong with that but puhleease you don't have to come wearing FCUK shirts and shades at 6 o'clock in the evening hoping some TV crew would come for an interview . *eyes rolling* Anyway, who really cares as long as the aid reaches the right places . What a cynic I am ... ehehehe ... sorry guys couldn't help that last jab .

Okey, on a more personal front, inlaws are quite adamant I take son to a pre-school since at the mature age of 2 years and 4 months he still refuses to say anything apart from Baba and Mama . Small, wee li'l hitch there ... schools take as much as Rs. 50,000 admission fees for the pre-schools alone . Yikes ! Now the only solution to that is that I get a job in some school and get admission for my son in the same place which would mean no admission or monthly charges . Problem with that is I HATE WAKING UP EARLY IN THE MORNING . So what now ? I applied to one place and also got the job which I have to start from Tuesday … but I don’t want to …. Boo hoo hoo . L

The latest place to visit in Islamabad is Gelatto Affair . It’s an ice cream parlour and those of you who are familiar with Karachi must have heard about it . Now I had been dying to go but the limited budget we are on wouldn’t permit(t) me to indulge myself … but one fine day I finally hought to hell with it I am gonna spend from the money I had been saving up in case son must go to school on full fees … (I am soooo sweet no ?) I left in my most pathetic pair of clothes and with no lipstick on (the only way you would catch me without wearing one is if I die and go to HELL) and my hubbie wore his rust coloured shalwar kameez from Charsadda in N.W.F.P. and Peshawari chappal . On getting there what do we see … these teenagers and those pretending to be teenagers but clearly looking like it had been a decade since they enetered their 20’s dressed to kill … teeny tiny fancy tops with trousers that would put Kylie Minogue to shame (a veryyyy little bit of exaggeration there), huge clunky earrings and fluorescent make-ups and boys … well boys will be boys … what else can I say . As we passed by (I and hubbie dahlin’) they gawked at us as if “Save us the martians have landed”… and I being the totally chilled babe that I am matched their glares with “hey dudes and dudettes we have the money , so what’s your problem?” HAHAHAHAHAHA … I love myself soooo much . As for the place itself, this BBCD who was there perhaps with his aunt or cousin or whoever she was took the words right out of my mouth … he very coolly turned to her with a look of utter disgust on his face and says “This is the place you have been talking non-stop about since the past 5 days?” :D:D:D

Did I tell you what happened to, what I call my hankie pankie hotmail address ? Boo hoo for me again … trying to act mega kewl I put the settings to this option where one is supposed to change the password every 75 days . It just happened to be my wonderful luck that just on the 70th day I had to go to Pindi where I have no computer. Coming back after a month or so I tried to connect but no use … the password has expired and I can’t retrieve the addie … waaaahhhhh …. Sniff sniff (again).

I guess that’s all for now folks … see ya later … and yeah I missed you too . *blowing kisses*

I Love The Metaphysicals .

THE FLEA.
by John Donne


MARK but this flea, and mark in this,
How little that which thou deniest me is ;
It suck'd me first, and now sucks thee,
And in this flea our two bloods mingled be.
Thou know'st that this cannot be said
A sin, nor shame, nor loss of maidenhead ;
Yet this enjoys before it woo,
And pamper'd swells with one blood made of two ;
And this, alas ! is more than we would do.

O stay, three lives in one flea spare,
Where we almost, yea, more than married are.
This flea is you and I, and this
Our marriage bed, and marriage temple is.
Though parents grudge, and you, we're met,
And cloister'd in these living walls of jet.
Though use make you apt to kill me,
Let not to that self-murder added be,
And sacrilege, three sins in killing three.

Cruel and sudden, hast thou since
Purpled thy nail in blood of innocence?
Wherein could this flea guilty be,
Except in that drop which it suck'd from thee?
Yet thou triumph'st, and say'st that thou
Find'st not thyself nor me the weaker now.
'Tis true ; then learn how false fears be ;
Just so much honour, when thou yield'st to me,
Will waste, as this flea's death took life from thee.

Boy oh Boy

Guys, guys, I am totally awesome . I mean I always knew how cool I was but the past 3 or so weeks I have realized what an EXTREMELY awesome person I am . Can you believe it ... I can still laugh, and talk, and basically I am still ALIVE! Like after the horriffic 4 months and another one that just passed I am still able to remain calm and composed and sane above all . Which stupid shrink said I had a depressive disorder, that too a "serious" one . Let's see ... does a normal 25 (oh okey party poopers I am 26) years old woman with a 2 years old baby boy having been through one nervouis breakdown and several ECTs come through "unharmed" from 2 yaers of suspecting her hubbie has an extramarital affair and then an agonizing 6 months of "knowing" he does and when he finally comes to take you away from your parents place and you think *sigh* all is well at last you find a picture of a naked woman on his cell sent from that BITCH'S number ? I don't think so . But trust me I am FINE ... I surprise even myself sometimes with the strength I have in me to come out of lifes disasters . Of course I had that nervous breakdown episode but I am human after all .

SO now all of you who are thinking where I have been the past few weeks, I have been trying to make the most of what's left of my marriage . Hubbie insists he is a changed man . Let's see . Ciao for now .... :D