Freaks Corner: December 2005

Last day of 2005!

Okey pals, it's the last day of 2005 . Am I nostalgic for it ? Maybe,
maybe not . This year made me mature much more and much quicker than I ever
thought possible . My innocent beliefs were torn apart . Hubbie was caught
cheating on me . Atleast I am 100% sure now that this women's sixt sense
thingie is true . I had the feeling all along but kept shunning it away
thinking "what the heck, I am acting just like a strupid housewife with
nothing better on her hands then to feel insecure about her husband". But
seems like it was true all along ... :( :)

I also discovered that in times of trouble it's rightly said even one's
shadow runs away from oneself . Those siblings that I was soooo sure of,
that promised to stand by my side whatever I may decide treated me like a
pariah . They felt insecure whenever I was around their hubbies ... as if I
was gonna grab them as soon as I could . It was disgusting but true . My
son cried after them every time they left the house in their cars with their
hubbies but noone thought of ever taking him out . My friends just
completely disappeared from the scene . I felt like such a fool ... how
could I be so stupendously naive as to believe anyone would help me or stand
by me . It has never happenned and never will ... I ahve always fought my
wars alone and that's how it's gonna be ... I am my only support, my only
friend .

Oh, WHATEVERRRRRr ... ! What's wrong with me ? The year's gone, the time
has passed, the pain has healed but the scars remain and I want it to stay
that way to save myself from future stupidity .

As Annie sang, "Tomorrow Is Another Day" . Bad things will happen and the
good things will also come . I atleast found through my experinece who
really was a friend and who wasn't . A person I had been sort of friends
with for a long time turned out to be a "real" friend ... standing by me and
supporting me through it all . You know who I am talking about and thank
you once again ... it meant a lot to me and heloped tremendously knowing
someone believed in me and knew I was right . :p

Ummmm ... what am I looking forward to in the new year ? Maybe a trip to
India ... that should be fun . Also my son learning his ABC's ... would
make me such a proud Momma ... I mean I am proud even now ... but that would
just add up to it ... :D

Another year means another birthday ... YIKKEEEEESSSSSSs ... I am nearing 30
... damn, when I was in matric I thought 30 was soooo DAMN OLD ! But I
don't feel the age in my bones or in my heart . Father says "A woman is as
old as she looks and a man as old as he feels". Told him that was most
definitely said by a "Man" but either way it goes to my advantage ... I
certainly look much younger than I am (hehehehe) and feel even younger than
that . One of my cousin's is 39 and she looks my age . If that's how 39/40
is I don't mind it at all . :D

Okey, coming to teh resolutions part, just liek every other year I have
absolutely no resolutions except maybe to stick to my job , put those
coppery purplish streaks in my hair, and pray more regularly ... not in that
order ofcourse ... :(

HAPPY NEW YEAR to all you freaks out there and obviously to be reading this
you must be a freak ... as no sane person would have the stamina to go this
far .... hehehehe .

Take care ... love ya all ... ummm ... in a brotherly, sisterly way ...
*rolling eyes and feeling sheepish at same time * :D

Sister Of MY Heart

Dear S', it's your birthday today ... you are far away and don't know how to reach you ... sure I called you on your cell but it's not the same ... I am more used to giving you a bear hug and holding you close to my heart for long moments . We have been so close and yet we have drifted so far apart . All the ups and down's we been through, the misunderstandings, the distances have changed things somehow . It's one birthday too many for me to be wishing you from far away .

Look now what you have done ... you have made me speechless ... I know I always had a weakness in ready tears but I have been becoming good t hiding them but you have made them come to my eyes . I miss you my most darling friend/cousin/soul-sis . I just keep on nurturing the hope we will be together again somehow somewhere someday . I miss you ......... so much .

Happy Birthday once again ! :)

Another Sick/Sikh One :D

A Sikh goes to Hyde Park . Sees a lump of shit . Goes near it and says, "Hmmm that looks like shit." Bends down and sniffs it and says, "Hmmm it smells like hit". Next he picks some up with his finger and tastes it and says, "Hmmmmmmmmm ... that even tastes like shit". Straightens up and says, "Thank you Guru in heaven I didn't step on it."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA :D

My New Love

Errr ... this might disgust some people ... specially those not on my freaks list but I have to make this confession ... it's been gnawing at me for the past 2 and a 1/2 years . Okey, now don't think it's easy so don't make it any more difficult for me ... here I go ... ummmmmmmm .... errrrrr ... ahem ahem .... okey, boys and girls and ladies and gentlemen this freak hereby confesses that she/moi is a BOOGER LOVER ! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH .... okey I did it and I am proud of myself so all you nincompoops out there may eat your hearts out for I have come out and 'fessed .

No, I don't mean I like eating them, or sniffing them, or I take out my own or that of everyone else ... I just like my son's boogers . My elder sis got me hooked . She used to say same thing about her kids and I wold be totally grossed out but after having my own I have realized how much fun it is . I deliberately let the mucous collect up for a couple of days and then holding his nostril with index finger I use my thumb to pull out/scratch out his booger . It's such a relieffffffff when it comes out nice and thick and big and .... oh alright won't get into all the "juicy" details . I feel like I have literal;ly helped him breath .

Hehehehe ... those of you with kids try this today and those without one start working on one just for this pleasure .... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA .

Still Remembered

Parveen Shakir was a famous urdu poet . Having graduated from Harvard in English Literature, she opted for C.S.S (Civil Superior Services) and got into the Income Tax group . She chose to write poetry in Urdu and became famous from the publication of her very first collection of poems . Here is one of the many I like :

Chara gar haar gaya ho jaise
Ab tu marna he dawa ho jaise

Mujh se bicchra tha woh pehle bhi magar
Ab ke yay zakham naya ho jaise

Mere maathe pay tere pyaar ka haath
Rooh par dast-e-saba ho jaise

Yoon buhat hans ke mila tha, lekin
Dil he dil mein woh khafa ho jaise

Sir chhupayein to badan khulta hai
Zeest muflis ki ridda ho jaise.

Toothache

Aaaahhhhh Dahlin's, it's so good to be back in freak land . Have you ever had a toothache ? Worse than that, have your wisdon teeth come out yet ? Booo hoooo ... mine started coming out some 3 years back during my M.A. final exams and I was very scared thinking they were going to hurt and I wasn't gonna be able to appear in the exams BUT all went well . The lower left one only cut through the gum but didn't come out all they way . Couple of weeks back it decided to explore the world outside better . AND PEOPLE IT HURT LIKE HELL ! I had a 104 temperature, was shivering like crazy, my teeth wouldn't stop chattering .... ah it's been horrible . It's better now thanks to the antibiotics . I did though get something good out of it ... for example hubbie clened up the baby ... okey ONCE but he did ... and that's a beginning and feels good ... :) Those of you who have children would know how nice it feels when hubbie decides to play "mommy" . It was soooo sweet and cute . Made some of the old feelings I had for him come back .

Hey, it's also his birthday today but I am not with him . Am at my parents'. But he said it was okey . Now that was nice of him too . Being quite nice to me lately come to think of it ... could it be something fishy ... hmmmm ... Women ... *rolling eyes* ... :D For a change I am happy . Been a long time since I last experienced that feeling . :D

Oh, merry christmas all ... Islamabad looked beautiful all decorated but as every year Kohsar Market had the best decorations ... the singing, dancing Santa was fun . I wish Eids were this fun too . Don't know why we don't do all the things Christians do on X-Mas ... like put up fancy colourful decorations, all men and women and kids go for prayers, collect gifts from people for the kids who can't afford them like at orphanages or in hospitals . It really brings out the best in Christians ... makes them reeeeaaaaaallll christian ... you know what I mean ... ;)

Had a meeting with the school head and it was awful. Was supposed to start at 9:30 but instaed it did on 2:30 and she went on and on telling us about her individual achievement and won't say a word that was useful to us ... I was really bummed since I went with my toothache and fever .

Hubbie says "gravy" is an American word and the english don't use it . Is it ? I wanna know .

Ciao for now and I missed you all . Will write again soon ... GO FREAKS ... :D

P.S. Pakistan really give a bad beating to England didn't it ? :D:D:D
P.P.S. Do wisdom teeth really make one wiser ? I don't feel any different . How about youi people ? :S

The Animal Test And The Irony Of It

I made hubbie take the Country Quiz ... he turned out to be Israel .... hehehe . Since that sounded better than Sudan so I decided to have a "competition" and try the Animal Test . Well, I turned out to be a "wooly mammoth" which is an ice age elephant in simpler terms ... you think that's funny *huffing and puffing* ... wait till you hear what hubbie turned out to be .... LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL *gasp gasp* ... okey will end the suspense but oh my gosh it's so funny ... he is a "mosquitoe" ... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Poor English

I just have to share this with all you freaks out there ; it just had me cracking up ... :D

English gone awry!

These are signs in hotels and other public places in foreign countries where they make the effort to write signs in English but their efforts go astray.

In a Vienna hotel: In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter.

A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest: It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpuse.

In a Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpuse.

In a Rome laudry: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.

In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our horse-driven city tours -- we guarantee no miscarriages.

Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to ride on your own ass?

On the tap in a Finnish washroom: To stop the drip, turn cock to right.

In a Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman even foreigner if dressed as a man.

In a Tokyo bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.

In a Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions.

In a Norwegian cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.

At a Budapest zoo: Please do not feed animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.

In the office of a Roman doctor: Specialist in women and other diseases.

In a Tokyo hotel: Is forbidden to steal hotel towel please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read this notice.

In a Belgrade hotel elevator: To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.

In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk.

In a Yugoslavian hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.

In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.

Similarly, from the Soviet Weekly: There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Aets by 15,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years.

In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.

In the menu of a Polish hotel: Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up the country people's fashion.

In a Hong Kong supermarket: For your convenience, we recommend courteous, efficient self-service.

Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs.

In a Rhodes tailor shop: Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.

In an East African newspaper: A new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers.

In a Bangkok dry cleaner's: Drop your trousers here for best results.

In an Acapulco hotel: The manager has personally passed all the water served here.

From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.

From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.

Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance:

English well talking.
Here speeching American.

Visit To The Shrink Pt. 2

Hmmm , haven't been posting anything the past few days . Been sick . Same old thing ... yeah guessed it right ... depression . Been having mild spells ... mild in the sense that since I have been ALLLLLLL the way there so this seems quite a joke . Went to see the doc (yeah the handsome one with the nice perfume ehehehe) . First of all was disappointed not to see a stampede there ... yara of blogging guys trying to catch a glimpse of moi ... *giggle* and then thought like most of them (infact all I have ever met) they just couldn't sum up the guts to meet up with a beauty with brains (sounds like a line out of the Miss World pageant!!!) . Anyway, hubbie accompanied this time . Doc's final verdict : I have a biolar disorder, meaning a manic state of depression . Now that shouldn't surprise me since I have never had any qualms about accepting my freaky streak but seriously speaking it is kinda scary . Scariest part is that it carries into kids and I don't want my child to inherit it from me (boo hoo for me) . The basic definition of a bipolar disorder is such that it makes me doubt everything about myself ... all that I am, all that I believe, all that I have faith in . For example, I have this gift you call it or a curse but I am a bit into dream forecasts and I can sometimes understand what other people are dreaming of ... I mean I can translate a dream . I know what most of you must be thinking "... that shows you do have a manic disorder but AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHH ... how can I make anyone believe me ? Not that I really care about what anyone thinks (no disrespect meant to any of you reading this) in the sense that what's important is what I believe myself . For me this has always been just an accepted fact but when the doc was talking about all of this I felt a doubt raise it's head for the first time ever . It's probably just that I am scared ... No, let's say I am very scared . I don't want to be the hallucinating type , I don't wnt to be really "crazy"you know . I mean it's kewl being a freak but it's not nice at all being crazy . I have been through it kana ... I have had people sniggering behind my back saying "oh she is pagal" and trust me it doesn't feel good . I ahve always had a "devil may care" attitude towards such ignorant people but sometimes it can really hurt .

Sigh ... I can just go on and on about this . But best thing is to keep myself intact and not to let anything anyone says break me because if I loose faith in what I believe in and that special bonding I have with Him I will have nothing to live for ... not even my son 'cause what good is an insane mother to anyone ... :)) I'll be just a stigma attached to him ... it won't be nice for him to hear or to think "my mother was a looney who couldn't tell the difference between a dream and real life ; she was like a crazy prophet shouting through Hyde Park "The World Is Coming To An End" ??!?!?!?!

I Am Sudan ... :P

Found a link to this quiz called "Which Country Are You?" on a friend's blog . And guess what ? I am SUDAN ... *burst out laughing* . Here is what it had to say :

You're Sudan!

Every time you get a headache, you reach for some aspirin, only to
realize that someone destroyed it. That's just how things are going for you right
now... it's hard to eat, hard to sleep, hard to not have a headache. You try to
relax, but people always jump on you about something that doesn't make sense. If
you were a goat, you'd be a Nubian.

Take the Country Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid

In Times Of Weakness

Something a friend said to me brings me so much strength at times when I am down ... here I would like to share it with you all ...

1 : Don't tell God how great your problem is ; tell your problems how great God is .

2 : Losing a battle doesn't mean you have lost the war .

So true ! Thanks pal ... :P

Thus Spoketh Satan Or Modern Man , Defiant In Ignorance Or Maybe Pain

Is this the region, this the soil, the clime,"
Said then the lost Archangel, "this the seat
That we must change for Heaven?--this mournful gloom
For that celestial light? Be it so, since he
Who now is sovereign can dispose and bid
What shall be right: farthest from him is best
Whom reason hath equalled, force hath made supreme
Above his equals. Farewell, happy fields,
Where joy for ever dwells! Hail, horrors! hail,
Infernal world! and thou, profoundest Hell,
Receive thy new possessor--one who brings
A mind not to be changed by place or time.
The mind is its own place, and in itself
Can make a Heaven of Hell, a Hell of Heaven.
What matter where, if I be still the same,
And what I should be, all but less than he
Whom thunder hath made greater? Here at least
We shall be free; th' Almighty hath not built
Here for his envy, will not drive us hence:
Here we may reigh secure; and, in my choice,
To reign is worth ambition, though in Hell:
Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven.
But wherefore let we then our faithful friends,
Th' associates and co-partners of our loss,
Lie thus astonished on th' oblivious pool,
And call them not to share with us their part
In this unhappy mansion, or once more
With rallied arms to try what may be yet
Regained in Heaven, or what more lost in Hell?"

(Book 1, Paradise Lost)

Visit To The Shrink

Went to see a new shrink today . Had an impressive list of degrees on his ego-wall . Between you and me, he was quite cute too ... :D No, not cuuute ... handsome and he smelled good ... DON'T GET ANY IDEAS ... he had probably bathed in the perfume . Even the waiting area smelled of it . Nonsence apart , I feel I can trust this guy and his ability as a doc for the loonies . He listened more than he talked, he didn't offer sympathetic looks at the emotional parts in the story, he more than anything else didn't treat me like most doctors treat us "muggles" ... as brainless twits . He told me quite frankly what he thought of the "case", and how he thought he could help and what I had to do . Am going to see him again with hubbie on Friday ... and No that doesn't mean that all you guys out there dying to see beautiful moi and find out more about me can make plans together and sit outside every shrinks' door that you know waiting for moi to show up on Friday ... (seriously I am killing myself) .

P.S. To all you girls snorting and writhing ... how would they know it's her? Well, the answer is pretty obvious ... how many beautiful girls are there who also happen to have brains to put Einstein to shame ?
(Seriously nowwww ... have founbd a new way of killing myself ... laughing myself to death)

WE WON ... yahoooo .

Pakistan beat England ith one innings and a 100 runs . Shoaib Akhtar was devastating and Danish Kaneria worked wonders with his googly .

Youhana ... oops ... Mohamad Yousaf's double century and Kamran Akmal's century and a half was a feast to watch . Hurrayyyy ... can't wait for the one dayers to start . :D

Beautiful Pakistan

I guess I never mentioned it but my hubbie happens to be quite a good photographer . Here I am posting some of the pics he took on a tour through Punjab and a couple of pictures of N.W.F.P. They are really amazing though I have scanned them on a below 100 resolution . So feast your eyes ... Pakistan is beautiful .